My hostel days...aaah!!

Hi,

Today I was chatting with a batchmate (and hence hostelmate), whom I have not met since maybe some 8-9 years. She was very concerned about my son's omnipresent cough and said she would try and heal him through Reiki. (okay, I do not know whether it works or not, but this blog is not about alternate therapies) She told me not to mention it to my husband (our batchmate/hostelmate too), as he would not believe in this. I thought, Wow! she knows him so well; even though she was not close friends with him and has not met him for so many years also. (like people change also right?)

I guess probably it had to do with staying in the same hostel, almost on top of each other, for 2 whole years! There are small -small things that we picked up about each other (not all, there were 100 in our batch, but most) and sort of absorbed these. So, probably for most of my batchmates, I can predict how they would react to a certain situation, how they would be as parents/co workers/spouses (hmmm maybe yes)!

It was a lot of fun staying in a hostel, away from family (though my parents were never very strict with me) and doing things on my own. The late nights, gossiping, bitching and discussions about cute guys.......the small fights on why is XYZ taking so long in the bathroom, why does ABC's alarm clock always ring incessantly in the evenings......celebrating birthdays by throwing buckets of water at the birthday boy/girl....

But it was also a great learning experience.

So what did staying in a hostel teach me? It taught me lots of things, which I did not realize then. These are things that get ingrained in one's personality and yes like sponge again, get absorbed in behaviour and value systems.

Firstly, it taught me independence. For someone who had stayed with family till 21 years, it was a major change, handling own expenses, managing time, food and friends. But these parts were easier. The most difficult was trying to figure out who is what.....and making friends accordingly. In this regard, I had led a 'sheltered' life - my closest friends had been with me since childhood; my college group did not change for those 3 years (and till now also). So, first time I was meeting people from different cultures, academic backgrounds, aims and ambitions. And thinking...."Okay, shall I be friends with this one or that one.....?" :):)

On the independent bit, once I remember I had 104 fever and there was no one on my hostel floor. Still I kept my wits about and did not panic. I collected as many sheets and duvets I could find in my room, wore many clothes; and waited for my body to sweat; and someone to find me. (I forgot to mention, mobiles were rare those days) Even now, whenever I am in a panic situation, I remember that day and know I will be okay.

Secondly, it taught me adjustment. It was about adjusting with a smaller room, narrow bed; a roomie, who was not a blood relation (though she was damn sweet!!! I still miss her at times), shared bathrooms; dirty loos (only guys are not dirty, girls are too and HOW!!!); lack of sleep; bad food (I found that the bread regularly had dead spiders in it...not joking!!) ......oh!!!! It was also about adjusting with different people; yet managing to live happily.

This learning has helped me even now. I can eat any type of food, share bathrooms and beds (though I draw a line at dirty loos) and can make do with less sleep. I also look at the positives of a person and for a change, have friends who are very different from me. Hence, I am basically less stressed out, and happier with myself.

Though I am not close to a lot of batch mates now, there is a certain comfort factor. Hence, I can chat freely and warmly with them; tease them; ask them 'personal' questions (when are you planning a baby types?)........ I still feel that I belong to that large family.

Sigh...wish those would return again. Luckily for me, my husband and I reminisce about those hotel days occasionally, and relive those happy moments.

Ciao